Its that time of year again when so many of us looks at the things we haven’t done or wish we could do and make promises to ourselves that that this year will be different.
This year I will be healthier, eat less, exercise more, complain less, be a better person…..you fill in the blank.
As commendable as many of those intentions are, you can be pretty confident that within a few weeks for most people they will fall by the wayside and be forgotten.
Why is that?
Why are good intentions so often doomed to failure?
I think it is wrapped up in the paradigm (part 1 and part 2) of just trying harder rather than changing our thinking which is where the real power to change lies.
How we see the world, affects what we do and in turn that affects the results that we get. So to get to the root if we want to change our behaviour we have to change the way we look at things.
If you do what you have always done, you will get what you have always got. But change the way you look at something and you will begin to change what you do and ultimately the results that you get.
Whatever it is that you want to change you have to ask yourself the question why?
If you can get excited and motivated by the reason why, then the what will flow naturally.
The key is being able to change your level of thinking. We mentioned in the post on paradigms the following quote by Einstein:
“The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we had when we first created them.“
So although I may not necessarily believe in new year resolutions I certainly do believe in the ability of us as human beings being able to bring about profound and deep lasting change to our lives. This time of year it is certainly good to reflect on the past 12 months and make plans for the coming year, but beware of the temptation to think I just need to try harder.
On the one hand, our past does not have to predict our future. As quoted in the film ‘My Big Fat Greek Wedding’:
Don’t let your past dictate who you are, but let it be a part of who you become.
It is in the power to choose that we can be able to create our future rather than be a slave to our past. But, on the other hand, I also believe that lasting change is only possible through the grace of God.
John Newton (1725-1807), who was a slave trader and had a profound personal change and awakening in his life was able to say:
“By the grace of God, I am what I am. I’m not what I want to be, but I thank God I am not what I once was.”
I love that quote as it beautifully captures the tension of being content where I am and at the same time being ambitious for the potential that God has for me.
As a disciple of Christ I can also take that a step further by dwelling in the realisation that God accepts me not through my performance, but the finished work of Christ on the cross. The more that takes hold of me the more the more the pressure comes off as I become less focussed on how I am doing or not doing. I am currently reading a book by J. D. Greer called ‘Gospel: recovering the power that made Christianity revolutionary.‘ In it he refers to the Gospel Prayer which I want to make a daily prayer for the rest of my life:
“In Christ, there is nothing I can do that would make You love me more, and nothing I have done that makes You love me less.”
“Your presence and approval are all I need for everlasting joy.”
“As You have been to me, so I will be to others.”
“As I pray I’ll measure Your compassion by the cross and Your power by the resurrection.”
So in many ways my new year resolution, if I were to have one, would be to allow the truths of that prayer to go deeper into my life and dictate everything I say and do.
What are your thoughts on the potential for human change?
What role do you think faith and God has to play in human change? How much are we responsible for and how much should we leave to God?
Hi Sunil,
You wrote “So although I may not necessarily believe in new year resolutions I certainly do believe in the ability of us as human beings being able to bring about profound and deep lasting change to our lives.”
but then kind of contradicted this by saying “on the other hand, I also believe that lasting change is only possible through the grace of God”.
I personally think it’s dis-empowering to say that ‘God changed me’ rather than the empowerment of ‘I changed myself through my own hard work and/or with the help of A, B or C’.
I think your statement above places too much reliance on God which, as I have found, can cause great disappointment and send you backwards.
Thanks Karl for picking up on what seems to be an apparent contradiction in my comments about us being able to make profound changes with out lives and at the same time relying on the grace of God. Rather than being contradictory I actually see them as complementary. An analogy of a beautiful garden may be helpful. To make a beautiful garden takes a lot of hard work in terms of pulling out weeds, planting seeds, watering and fertilising along with a lot of other jobs. However, in spite of all his his or hard work the gardener cannot actually put any life in the plants – that has to come from outside of the gardener and he/she is actually helpless to enable that to happen.
Similarly to say I changed myself through my own hard work is only partially honest, because where did I get the strength from to do the hard work or the mind to be able to achieve – I certainly did not create myself or create my mind. Why do I have the resources I currently have? Why am I born with the ability to do what I do and not say, in a slum in a deprived country or with brain damage unable to care for myself? It is all because of the grace of God.
What I meant by ‘A, B or C’ is a psychiatrist/counsellor or a book for instance.
The A, B, C reminds me that all of those are ultimately provided by humans who are made by God.
God’s common grace provides us with all those wonderful resources.
I refer you back to my comments on the article entitled lessons on life from Steve Jobs.
By that I mean we need to be careful to not put God into a religious box. It is a bit like the story of the man whose house was gradually flooding. A car came by and he was told to jump in to be rescued. He replied, he would not come as God would save him. The water levels rose higher until he was on the roof. A boat then came and he again refused to get in saying he was trusting in God. Finally a helicopter came to pull him up and he again refused. The flood waters rose and he eventually died and faced God. He was angry with God, saying why did you not rescue me? God’s response was – I sent you car, a boat and a helicopter!
My new years resolution is this: I hand ALL my addictions, ALL my bad habits, ALL my failures & weaknesses, ALL my illnesses & sickness, my finances & career and ALL my relationships over to You Lord Jesus and ask that You please fight for me and that Your will be done in my life for I am weak, but You are MIGHTY, AMEN!
Amen.
A journey of a 1000 miles begins with the first step.
Let us be thankful for how far we have come, but also remember we have a long way to go!